Breathe into it: parenting as yoga
Breathe into it: parenting as yoga, and other tips from our expert on how to become a better, more effective parent, while also maintaining your own sanity and well-being.
In the teachings of yoga, tension is experienced and released on three levels.Skip to next paragraph
Bonnie Harris, a parenting specialist for 25 years, is the director of Connective Parenting and is known for her pioneering mindset shift out of the reward-and-punishment model to a connected relationship. She conducts workshops and speaks on parenting topics and is the author of "When Your Kids Push Your Buttons" and "Confident Parents, Remarkable Kids: 8 Principles for Raising Kids You'll Love to Live with. She is the mother of two grown children and lives with her husband in New Hampshire. Click here to learn more about her.
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The first and most obvious is the physical, next the emotional and finally the mental.
In parenting it is the same thing. Our outward manifestations of tension, stress, worry, fear is in the physical – yelling, tone of voice, language, facial expressions. These physical aspects are underlined by the emotional – frustration, anger, exhaustion, defeat, hopelessness.
But underneath it all is the mental – our perceptions, the ideas and beliefs we hold about ourselves and our children, the standards of behavior we buy into, our expectations. In order to effect change in our physical and emotional reactions to our children, we must address our mental state.
How is it that you see and think of your children? Are they in general a pain in the neck? Do they never listen or do what they're told? Do you doubt everything and think you don’t know what to do? Or do you feel confident in yourself, mistakes and all? Do you know that this too will pass? Are you able to drop into the moment with your child without focus on the past or future?
Your mental state is what starts it all. How you think of yourself, how you think of your children informs everything you do. It is this mental strain that needs releasing.
Practice breathing into it.
The Christian Science Monitor has assembled a diverse group of the best family and parenting bloggers out there. Our contributing and guest bloggers are not employed or directed by the Monitor, and the views expressed are the bloggers' own, as is responsibility for the content of their blogs. Bonnie Harris blogs at Connective Parenting.