As troops ship out, stress is rising

Specialist Katherine Dean is writing her two children keepsake letters, to say she loves them and explain "why Mom joined the Army."

Cpl. Jeremy Tendler is telling his girlfriend he'll miss Christmas again, for the third year in a row.

First Lt. Stephen Hommel had to cancel a promised father-son kayaking trip when his infantry unit was ordered out a week early. Last Thursday, he hugged his wife and children one last time and boarded an aircraft for Kuwait.

As American troops depart for what could become a war with Iraq, the intimate logistics of family life are often obscured by high-visibility deployments of warships, armored vehicles, and fighter jets. Yet the prospect of an invasion is straining couples and leading some troops to seek ways to stay home. Indeed, as Pentagon leaders debate the strategy and risks of war, some in the rank and file are gauging the costs of a conflict – and finding them too high.

"We have soldiers who don't want to deploy ... because they feel it's ruining their marriage," says Capt. Adam Harris, the psychiatrist of the 3rd Infantry Division, a rapid-deployment infantry unit based at Fort Stewart that is preparing for an Iraq war. "The Army is not conducive to married life," he says.

Marital problems, sleeplessness, irritability, and other signs of stress have grown as war seems increasingly likely, he says. "We are seeing a high percentage of stress reactions" to a possible war, says Capt. Ronald Whalen, the division social worker. The uncertainty is also frustrating, as soldiers in the rapid-deployment division are told that a training exercise or routine mission could shift into active combat.

Adjusting to a wartime mission is a factor, too, Captain Harris says. "We don't really recruit soldiers saying 'War is the ultimate, you're going to fight,' " he says. "We have a kind of a peacetime army."

Significant numbers of soldiers, albeit a minority, are turning to chaplains and mental health officials to seek ways out of deployment. Spouses are telephoning military units to plead that their husbands stay behind. "You'd be surprised how many wives call and ask that their husbands not be deployed," says Corporal Tendler, assigned to the headquarters of a more than 700-strong infantry battalion now heading to Kuwait for at least six months.

Overall, the sentiment among officers, enlisted, and families interviewed at this vast wooded base 40 miles southwest of Savannah is one of hope that war can be averted, and reluctant acceptance if it cannot. Though confident of victory, they are wary of its price in what one mid-ranking officer calls "wasted lives."

"In my old age, I may be becoming somewhat of a peacenik," says Lieutenant Hommel, a Gulf War veteran from San Diego, Calif., who is now an Army chaplain. "Some of these [infantrymen] look like little boys to me, and it's unsettling to put them in harm's way."

Indeed, unspoken fear that departing troops may be injured or killed lies just beneath the surface, say spouses, soldiers, and military officials here.

"You go to the 'family readiness group' meetings and they start talking about wills and power of attorney and you say 'Wow, this is so final,' " says Naomi, Hommel's wife. "The emotions run high and you tend to think in the extreme," she says. "Will they attack the front line? Will I see him again?"

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