Obama tries Jedi mind trick to get economic stimulus package passed


You gotta credit President Obama. He's using every means possible to get his economic stimulus package passed. Some even unconventional.

Not even a full month into his presidency, Obama's already had a prime time news conference, he's fanned-out across the country in total campaign mode, and he even resurrected the campaign'ish "Obama house party" events to gin up support for the humongous spending package.

But who would have thought he had the guts to tried the vaunted Jedi mind trick?

Obi Wan

Sure, it's the most powerful tool there is. But so difficult to master.

You remember when Obi Wan Kenobi and Luke Skywalker got caught in a jam when the stormtroopers demanded Luke show proper identification?

Luke didn't have it.

Obi Wan though merely waved his hand and said hypnotically, "You don't need to see his identification."

To which the stormtrooper robotically replied, "We don't need to see his identification." And Luke and Obi Wan were then allowed to pass.

Hiring time

So when outlining the benefits of the stimulus package on Wednesday, the White House said that if it passed, Caterpillar Inc. would be able to hire back some of the 20,000 employees it's had to lay off.

"Today, the chairman and CEO of Caterpillar said that if the American Recovery and Reinvestment Plan passes, his company would be able to rehire some of those employees," Obama said while stumping for the bill in Springfield, Va.

But Caterpillar wouldn't confirm that.

In fact, the union representing Caterpillar disputed it.

“He’s not saying, ‘I’m going to rehire U.S. employees or even Peoria employees. He’s just saying if [the stimulus bill] is to his liking, then he’ll rehire some people that they laid off. To me, it’s more of a threat than anything else," said a union official.

Obama Wan Kenobi

Undaunted, the president channeled Obi Wan yesterday and while speaking at a Caterpillar plant in Peoria, Illinois, he boldly repeated his earlier assertion.

"Yesterday, Jim, the head of Caterpillar, said that if Congress passes our plan, this company will be able to rehire some of the folks who were just laid off," Obama Won Kenobi said.

Would the CEO cave just like the stormtroopers? Did the president play the ultimate card? Was President Obama a Jedi Master?


Uhhh. No.

When asked if he would be able to hire back some employees if the stimulus bill passed, the CEO replied, "I think, realistically, no. The honest reality is we're probably going to have more layoffs before we start hiring again."

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