Who would have ever guessed that there would still be so much drama to endure? And not only drama. American Idol viewers were pushed to the brink of endurance this week on several fronts.
First, we were subjected to one of the lamest Ford advert-videos ever made, and for a Ford video, that’s saying a lot.
Then, comedian/actor Russell Brand visited the contestants to offer some advice. Advice on what, no one can really tell. He essentially acted like the buffoon he gets paid to act like, although seeing the American Idol contestants respond to Brand’s humor felt like watching them take a Rorschach test. Haley Reinhart genuinely laughed throughout the clip of his visit, illustrating her laid-back, go with the flow persona. While Pia Toscano, on the other hand, seemed even further out of her comfort zone than she was when trying to move during her performance Wednesday night.
Later, the Bottom Three were finally announced and viewers learned that Stefano Langone, Jacob Lusk, and Pia were in the hot seats. These results, according to Jacob’s prophecy Wednesday night, prove that Americans indeed have trouble looking at themselves in the mirror. This realization came as something of a relief though, explaining why Lauren Alaina and Pia actually went on stage in those outfits.
Speaking of people going on stage without having looked in a mirror, host Ryan Seacrest then welcomed a shirtless Iggy Pop to the stage. Although Iggy Pop is a Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductee, he looked more like he was auditioning for the roll of Buffalo Bill in Silence of the Lambs. His performance ended up being scarier than the film and poor JLo looked like she wanted to take a shower after Mr. Pop approached the judges’ table.
The results came next and after pulling a cruel trick on Jacob, Ryan announced that it was actually Stefano and Pia in the Bottom Two. (Christmas came early for this blogger!) It was like a tale of two Italians; one who can’t perform and one who, well, just shouldn’t.
JLo looked appalled with America's vote but when Ryan announced that Pia was the contestant leaving the show, Jennifer looked like she was going to trash the stage. With tears in her eyes, Jennifer Lopez was like a modern day Socrates, as she grappled with the most difficult of all questions: Why?
And Randy Jackson said that he doesn’t often get upset on Idol but he was mad. That was mad, Randy? Whoa there, killer, calm down. Even Steven Tyler woke up just in time to agree that "America got it wrong."
That’s an interesting statement. How is it possible to get an opinion wrong? (This question is dedicated to all of my fans who take time out of their busy days to leave lovely comments about my blog.) And is it wrong for Americans to want stage presence as much as vocal abilities? After all, haven’t viewers been conditioned by the judges themselves, after 10 seasons of American Idol, to expect more than a pretty face and voice?
Well, farewell, Ms. Toscano. Please know that as you leave, you take with you any credibility this blogger had left with her predictions . . .
Take a moment to watch the video below that features Pia's original single recorded last year. Does she really have what it takes to make it in this business? Discuss.
[Editor's note: The original blog implied that Ford accepted government bail out money. Ford did not.]