Do what you have to do

"Of course, you have to fine me; it's your duty," Pedro Calvo forthrightly told the policeman who responded to a minor accident last week on a street in Madrid. Calvo, you see, had been riding his motorbike when the fender-bender occurred. And when the officer asked to see his license, he couldn't produce it. What's more, he confessed, it had expired a year ago. By the time the court finished with his case, the incident cost him $180. Who, exactly, is Pedro Calvo? Answer: the city's traffic safety director.

I don't want it that badly

In Koblenz, Germany, a thief escaped - twice - after ripping off a laptop computer from an electronics store last Thursday. Twice? Yah. He was out the door when a clerk chasing him fell, breaking a bone. Feeling remorse, the culprit returned, handed back the laptop, said, "I'm sorry," and took off again.

Americans have a smashing record in US Open tennis

Although only one-quarter of the players in this year's US Open tennis championships are Americans, don't be surprised if two of them hoist the winners' trophies when the tournament ends this weekend at New York's USTA National Tennis Center. Since the "open" era began in 1968, allowing professionals to enter, Americans have dominated, winning more than half of the 72 men's and women's singles titles. This year, American Andy Roddick is defending his men's crown and Justine Henin-Hardenne, a Belgian, the women's. The nations that have produced US Open champions, with the number of singles titles for each:

United States 39
Australia 9
Germany 6
Czechoslovakia 4
Sweden 3
Argentina 2, Spain, Yugoslavia

Belgium 1, Great Britain, Romania, Russia, Switzerland

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