Oh, this is embarrassing

Police in Hong Kong responded to the reported theft earlier this week of two laptop computers worth $2,500, which one inspector called "easy pickings" for the culprits - probably gang members who'd carefully scoped out the location ahead of time. And that was? The exhibition hall for Securitex 2004, a four-day international trade show demonstrating the latest in crime-prevention technology. Grumped one exhibitor: "If you can't expect good security here, where can you?"

See, I hate water spots

Roger Daniel probably never thought that the price of a car wash would come to $191 ... plus the loss of his driver's license for six months. The Whangarei, New Zealand, resident was arrested last week for doing 78 m.p.h. in a 30-m.p.h. zone. He told the police he'd just scrubbed the vehicle, but his back was bothering him and he didn't want to have to wipe it dry with a chamois.

Astros' Roger Clemens - a star who's still ascending

Roger Clemens of the Houston Astros may be surprising even himself this year with one of the fastest starts of his illustrious 21-year pitching career. Thursday night, against the lowly Pittsburgh Pirates, the future Hall of Famer could become the first 10-game winner in Major League Baseball this season. He had decided to call it quits after last season with the New York Yankees. But then came an offer to join his hometown team. "The Rocket" couldn't resist. The six-time Cy Young Award winner is the only active player with 300 or more "W's." And each new one moves him closer to Warren Spahn, the winningest pitcher of the post-World War II era. The members of the modern "300 club" with their career victory totals:

Warren Spahn 363
Steve Carlton 329
Nolan Ryan (tie) Don Sutton 324
Roger Clemens 319
Phil Niekro 318
Gaylord Perry 314
Tom Seaver 311
Early Wynn 300

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