Want to really scare friends and family this Halloween? Look no further than the economy. Here are our picks for the freakiest Halloween costumes inspired by the business world.
5. Tea Party activist
The Constitution protects the freedom of assembly. We'll leave it at that.
Fear factor: Varies depending on locality. Increases considerably with sidearm.
4. Moody's Spokesmoose
Developed to help Moody's, a financial ratings agency, after their reputation hit the skids during the near meltdown in the financial markets.
Costume: Run over standard moose costume with the heaviest vehicle parked nearby. On the costume's resulting treadmark, write "Financial Crisis" with a magic marker. Using said marker, give moose head two black eyes.
Fear factor: Low, but highest overall creepiness.
3. Galleon Insider Trading Pirate
Costume: Pirate hat, expensive suit jacket, dangling gold chains. Buy old, boxy cellphone and cheap plastic sword. Detach blade from sword and glue to top of phone. Optional: Stacks of fake money. Lots of them.
Fear factor: Moderate.
2. Bernie Madoff
The man who knocked the Enron boys off the pantheon of Most Widely Known Crooks.
Costume: Bernie Madoff mask, orange jump suit, nostalgia. Optional: Handcuffs, leg chains, yarmulke.
Fear Factor: On the rise after Madoff triumphed in a jail yard brawl.
1. Vampire Squid – Goldman Sachs CEO Lloyd Blankfein
Inspired by Rolling Stone: "The world's most powerful investment bank is a great vampire squid wrapped around the face of humanity, relentlessly jamming its blood funnel into anything that smells like money."
Costume: No clue. But you could start with this.
Fear Factor: ...Mommy!