It's not the first thing Ahmed Jebari says about Sept. 11, but this quiet confession reveals unease contrary to his relaxed Mediterranean composure. Mr. Jebari left Morocco in 1975 to study in the US and decided to stay, eventually becoming an American citizen. That he has thoughts about going back to Morocco underlines his concerns about the polarizing effect of Sept. 11.

	Jebari's last memories of the twin towers. The horse that needed an Arabic name.

A congenial man, Jebari traces the aftershocks of the attack through a sudden disorientation in his relationships. Some colleagues at the Center for Islamic Studies at Harvard University, where he is the office coordinator, were quick to see Muslims behind the attack, something that surprised him given the rash judgments following the 1995 Oklahoma City attack. Others feared a backlash and suggested that he take a taxi home for the day. But he wanted to stay – and to discuss.

In the weeks that followed, friends seemed easily spooked. When he joked to a group of Moroccan friends to stop speaking their "foreign language" in public, they fell silent. Bumping into another friend who looked rattled, Jebari expressed concern – only to upset the friend further.

People's initial shock gradually gave way to a need for information. Strangers who had observed him on his daily commute or in the grocery store now asked him questions about Islam. Questions also poured into the Center from the media, and as office coordinator he directed inquiries to the proper experts. This gave him an inside view to the knowledge within the media about Muslims and the Islamic world. The Center also received calls from local Muslims looking for information to share with the community.

Jebari sees this dialogue as part of his contribution in the struggle against terrorism. "I'm [fighting for] more dialogue, cooperation, peaceful coexistence between people," he says. "I'm not interested in being a soldier in the sense that I'll get a gun in my hand. I don't believe in that kind of fight. But a war on terrorism is informing people: what is this terrorism we are fighting?"

Jebari feels Americans are being "terrorized by many sides." He explains, "Somebody getting on an airplane and jamming it into buildings – there is no doubt that it is really terrorizing people. But I would look also to other side and think that a law that the government here in the United States is working on is really terrorizing people. And I'm thinking specifically of certain issues like using secret evidence when people go to the court."

Expanded police powers in the wake of Sept. 11 have complicated Jebari's desire to be an information warrior. He worries that strangers who come to him with innocuous questions could be plotters. If they were later caught with his phone number or e-mail address, police would be on his doorstep.

"Do I just live my life and just talk to everybody and anybody, or should I start to become selective who to talk to? I never thought I should be selective (in the past)," says Jebari. "If I'm going to become fearful in that sense – to lose my rights – I question whether I should continue to live here, and how much can I get involved in changing these negative aspects."

– Ben Arnoldy, photo by Stuart S. Cox Jr.