Etc.

I only did what it said to do

From Kings Lynn, England, comes word that the Streamline Taxi service is not planning to offer river cruises. Nor will it be branching out into the ferry business, so callers should stop asking. Why is this even a question? Well, because things didn't go – ah – swimmingly for the company on a Saturday earlier this month. It seems one of its drivers was on his way to pick up a late-night fare in the nearby village of Castle Acre when he arrived at an unfamiliar stretch of road. But at least he had a satellite navigation system to guide him, so he followed its directions faithfully. Right into ... the River Nar, before his minivan came to a stop, up to its fenders in muck, hundreds of yards from where he left the pavement. Now, there was no immediate danger to anyone; the Nar is neither wide nor swift. But after the driver called for help, his bosses found him still behind the wheel with his pant legs rolled up to his knees. Oh, and "there were fish swimming around the headlights," which were still on. A farmer with a heavy tractor towed the minivan to dry land the next day, and it was returned to base for a thorough maintenance check, perhaps even of the navigation unit. As for our guy, he was too embarrassed to discuss what happened, especially since his fellow drivers showed up for work wearing snorkels. Whether the waiting fare ever got picked up hasn't been reported.