The 11 best promposals of 2013
It's prom season. What's your prom proposal/promposal going to be?
What? Wait wait wait, hold on. You're telling me you didn't write an original song, choreograph a routine for it, and present it flash mob-style to your dream high school prom date? Well, listen up rookie, you've got a lot to learn. Promposals these days are elaborately produced mating rituals — think of Planet Earth's Birds of Paradise and mash it up with your favorite episode of Glee.
Then upload it to YouTube because this isn't about your exuberant manifestation of true love, it's about that special someone. Don't they deserve Internet fame?
Sometimes done well enough to gain national attention – I'm looking at you Kate Upton fan – sometimes too cringeworthy to view, here are 11 promposals you need to consider before planning your own.
1. You're on the cover of Sports Illustrated. I read Sports Illustrated.
Jake Davidson, a 17-year-old from Los Angeles, realized prom season was fast approaching and he didn’t have a girlfriend. That could prove troubling for some, but not Jake. He’s got an easy out. He’ll just use his video editing skills and social media network to make a humble plea for super model Kate Upton to be his prom date.
The promposal seen round the web spread from online person to online person faster than a One Direction music video release.
In the video, Jake says going to prom with Ms. Upton pre-ordained, it is destiny. She’s the yin to his yang. Why? While doing pushups, Jake makes his case which would, if we’re honest, easily pass the muster of Standford’s doctorate thesis committees: She likes sports, he likes sports. She likes fine dining, he likes fine dining. She’s on the cover of Sports Illustrated, and he reads Sports Illustrated.
Watch out Johnnie Cochrain, this kid’s going on the offensive and his evidence is air-tight.
Upton’s first response was through Twitter. It was only a maybe, but gave Jake more hope for success than the cross-town Los Angeles Clippers ever had. The media soon caught up and Jake was invited for an interview on the Today Show. Discarding formal attire and the first two buttons of the casual plaid shirt he did wear, Jake reminded everyone why he asked Upton (again, a common interest in sports). Then, surprise, Upton came on and stunned Jake with a conditional “I do” to his promposal.
The honeymoon was, as it always is, too short. Upton, once the media hullabaloo subsided, soon reneged. She won’t be going with Jake after all. Publicity doesn’t care whose heart it breaks.