The Autobiography of Mark Twain
It’s worth wading through this massive tome to mine its nuggets of unalloyed Twain.
The Autobiography of Mark Twain, Volume 1, is a weighty piece of literature: five pounds if it’s an ounce, and 736 pages long. But please don’t blame Mr. Mark Twain. The first 58 pages are hijacked by an editor, and the last 267 pages are squandered on appendixes, notes, references, indexes, lost laundry tickets, and recipes for chicken con carne. Those last two might not be all together accurate, but let it go. I defy anyone to disprove me by wading through this semantic morass.Skip to next paragraph
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Surrounded though he is by six editors, Twain still manages to get a few words in edgewise. At one point he describes his feeling about being edited for the first time in 32 years: “The idea! That this long-eared animal – this literary kangaroo – this bastard of the Muses – this illiterate hostler, with his skull full of axle-grease – this.... But I stopped there, for this was not the right Christian spirit.”
It is well that Twain did not live to be 175 and witness the publication of his posthumous, unexpurgated autobiography. It would have laid him low, to be sure. Parts of it repeat passages from editions of his previously published autobiography: an account of his first public lecture, for example. There are new segments here, of course, but they hardly seem scandalous or scathing enough to have been kept from the public for a century after his death. Perhaps Volumes 2 and 3 will contain more of the rockets’ red glare.
The truth is that the juicy, uncensored stuff has been leaking out for decades, such as in “Letters for the Earth,” prepared for publication in 1937 but not released until 1962. In it, Twain, a nominal Christian for most of his life, fulminates against the Almighty in the most sacrilegious fashion imaginable. Nothing in the current volume comes close.
Having said all that, it is worth dodging the phalanx of editors to get at Twain’s prose and off-the-cuff observations. Some of these pieces were dictated late in his life. He is a marvel of observation and verbal assassination. This is how he sneaks up on a newspaper editor: “[He was] a man of sterling character and equipped with the right heart, also an historian where facts were not essential.” He nails Teddy Roosevelt: “He flies from one thing to another with incredible dispatch – throws a somersault and is straightaway back again where he was last week. He will then throw some more somersaults and nobody can foretell where he is finally going to land after the series.” His description of Londoners throwing pennies from tenement windows to bedraggled street singers below is delightful.
Such reports remind the reader that Twain began his literary career as a journalist and before that he was a miner and before that a deserter from the Confederacy. He was a man on the make, an American through and through. He was poor and made a fortune. Lost it and made another one. He would become one of the most famous men in the world; cavort with presidents, plutocrats, and generals; and live at times like the royalty he so vividly scorned in a world that was still chock-full of kings and queens and dukes and such gaudy truck.