Displaced by March Madness

Boyfriends will just have to be patient while female basketball fans take time for what's really important: watching the games.

By Jennifer Willis

from the March 20, 2008 edition

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After being single for years, I've started seeing someone new. And he's about to become a college basketball tournament widower.

Surveys estimate that about one-third of all college basketball fans are women. So when the NCAA tournament rolls around (March 20 – April 7), Mike could find himself in good company among the other temporarily displaced boyfriends – or he could learn to like basketball.

We already have our fair share of differences – he's a conservative, vegetarian Gentile; I'm a liberal, carnivorous Jew. But this potential conflict promises some entertainment value, as my new beau discovered when he bravely sat down at my place for an Atlantic Coast Conference (ACC) game: University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill (UNC) versus Duke University in Durham, N.C.

Mike quickly decided that watching me was more interesting than the game itself.

I went to Duke and am a serious Blue Devils basketball fan. I have Duke sweat shirts, T-shirts, hats, and sweat pants. I have a giant – size XL – Duke hockey jersey that comes out of the closet for important round-ball games. I have to be careful not to trip myself up while wearing it – I'm 5-foot, 4-inches tall and weigh 120 pounds – but that's part of the fun.

UNC is Duke's biggest rival. These matchups are always tense and exciting – the best college hoops has to offer.

A few minutes before tip-off time this particular Saturday night, I pulled the giant jersey on over my head and turned on ESPN. Mike showed up and stopped in his tracks when he saw me. My sleeves were about eight inches too long, and the hockey jersey's hem fell below my knees.

Mike's a hockey player. A curious smile spread across his face, and I wondered if the Duke superjersey offended his sensibilities.

"Umm, nice dress," he commented.

After that, I barely noticed he was there. UNC was leading by a large margin, but the Blue Devils were rallying, closing the gap. Mike expressed disbelief that a basketball game is made up of only two 20-minute halves.

He wasn't sure whether to sit or stand, because I was in constant motion – perched on the arm of the couch, then jumping up and dancing around in a circle when Duke's Greg Paulus sank a three-pointer. I snapped my fingers and shifted my weight from one foot to the other when UNC stole the ball. Mike thought I was having some kind of fit.

Crouched on the floor like a feral cat, I dug my hands into my hair as UNC's Tyler Hansbrough got the ball and squared his feet. "No, no, no!" Hansbrough made the basket. I climbed to my feet and muttered at the screen.

Mike erupted in laughter. "I never knew basketball could be this much fun."

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