In India, an elusive room of one's own
Young single women in New Delhi who want to live solo are viewed with suspicion.
from the June 14, 2007 edition
Page 3 of 3
"I did meet a couple of idiotic landlords," says Karishma Singh, of her recent search for an apartment in New Delhi. "One feels a little judged by them. They think there is something wrong with you. They always have to ask you if you have a boyfriend. It is such a key question. But it's none of their business."
The fact that you have a boyfriend raises questions about your morality, Ms. Singh says. "They think you might be a bad girl."
Some single Indian women still prefer living at home. Kanika Loomba attended college in New Delhi and now lives with her parents and works for the International Red Cross. "For me, it's the best of both," she says. "I can concentrate on my work, and everything else is taken care of."
Others say living at home until marriage stifles their ability to grow, learn to navigate a city, take care of themselves, pay bills, and meet new people.
Mohar Chatterjee moved from Calcutta to New Delhi for college and got a job doing late-night shifts at a call center so she could remain independent and postpone her parents' plans for an arranged marriage for her.
"Staying in Calcutta would curtail my freedom," Ms. Chatterjee says. "Staying here is also a headache because the landlords think every time you bring a male friend home you are starting a brothel. It's insulting."
Madhu Bhatia Jha, also told her parents that she needed to stay in Mumbai (Bombay), the city where she'd attended university, because that was the only place where she could get a job – though that wasn't true.
"You can get a job anywhere," Ms. Jha says. But "when you stay home, it narrows your concept of life."
Jha says she looks forward to the day when young women in India won't have to lie or pay higher rents in order to have a place to call their own.
"The change is definitely happening here and it's for the better," Jha says. "Even if you live alone at an early age, that family connection is not going to get lost."
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