An alternative summer reading list
Books I always wanted someone to write.
Recently I came upon a book titled – I am not making this up – "Hitler: Neither Vegetarian nor Animal Lover." Inspired by the "uniqueness" of this title, I have been searching for writers to flesh out some equally unexpected, and so far unavailable, manuscripts.
While I am not asking for coauthor credit, I will demand a share of the film rights and any royalties derived from marketing ventures with fast-food chains and carbonated beverages.
Napoleon: Not as Short as You Think
Shakespeare: Father of the Bolo Tie
Julia Child: The Basketball Years
Eleanor Roosevelt: Her Favorite Manicures
Saul Bellow: Sweet or Sour Pickles – Did He Make the Right Choice?
Cecil B. Demille: How to Direct Through a Megaphone Without Looking Like a Haddock
Jean Harlow and Jean-Paul Sartre: The Affair That Never Began
Michelangelo: His Mother's Least Favorite Pastas
Chicken Caesar: Coward or Salad?
Dick Cheney: His Most Cherished Vice Presidential Limericks
The Himalayas: An In-Depth Guide to Their Mexican Restaurants
London, England; and Lincoln, Neb.: Two Cities That Begin With the Same Letter
Harry S. Truman: Why the S. Didn't Stand for Sue
Barry Bonds: His Singular Approach to Darning Socks
The Brasseries of Paris: An Indispensable Guide to Their Saltshakers
James Monroe: Not James Madison
James Madison: Not James Monroe
New York City: All the Best Tollbooths
Harrison Ford: His Collection of Winks
• Chuck Cohen is a writer who lives in Mill Valley, Calif.