Line up estate now, ease burdens later
In an era of divorce and stepfamilies, it is essential to keep wills current - but 60 percent of Americans do not.
from the February 28, 2007 edition
Page 3 of 3
Changing family structures create other legal complexities. "It's fairly common now to have a family with a spectrum of people, such as a husband and wife who have both been married once or twice before," says Terence Nunan, an attorney in Los Angeles. "Each of them may have had a child or two, and their current marriage has a child or two." These half siblings and stepsiblings can figure in an inheritance.
Mr. Tuttle emphasizes the importance of keeping all documents current.
"If you've got IRAs, life insurance, or annuities, that has nothing to do with your will," he says. "Whoever is listed as a beneficiary on that paper is who gets that, regardless of what your will says. We hear horror stories all the time. Someone divorces, remarries, forgets to change the beneficiary from his ex-wife to his new wife, and the ex-wife gets $3 million."
Greg Wilson, a public-relations consultant in Washington, D.C., faced legal challenges even though his mother had prenuptial agreements for herself and her second husband, a trust for the house, and wills. He advises others to get a good lawyer, talk about things early and often, be diplomatic, throw away junk, and give away a keepsake to those who want one. Finally, he says, "Remind yourself that it's only stuff – or money."
Keep things in perspective
Herigstad offers other suggestions: Update your will every few years. Stay current on taxes and bills. And if you aren't sure what your children want, ask. "Some of the papers my father threw away would have been more valuable to us than the boxes of knickknacks he left us," she says.
Despite the challenges she faced, she takes a forgiving approach. "I think he would have liked to have made things easier for us if he had only known how."
As one way of making things easier, Joan Bramsch of St. Louis urges parents to "lighten up" their possessions. "After having boxed, hauled, given away, discarded, and categorized a lifetime of belongings, letters, cards, old bills, old clothes, recipes, magazines, photographs, and so on for four grandparents, two parents, a father-in-law, and a husband, I have vowed not to burden my children with that thankless chore," she says.
She adds that she has given enough utensils, furniture, dishes, towels, and bedding to a women's shelter to furnish an apartment. "Not only does it do good, but my 'unstuffed' home now has been renewed. The energy is simply refreshing."
Ms. Bramsch, an educator, also has her financial and legal affairs in order. She has begun sharing possessions with her children and grandchildren who want them. And she has edited more than 10,000 family 35mm slides down to 4,000, which she will scan onto CDs.
Her labors, which could serve as a model for others, have not gone unnoticed. "My children," she says, "appreciate the effort so much."
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