Etc...

Timber-r-r-r-r!

When is an officer of the law more than just a policeman? Answer: when he's also a lumberjack. At least, that was the case earlier this month in Valdres, Norway, after a young foreign national ignored orders to pull his car to the side of the road for an identity check. The suspect led a late-night, high-speed chase out of town, then abandoned the vehicle and disappeared into a nearby forest. Eventually, officers spotted him trying to hide at the top of a tall evergreen. Since attempts at persuasion and threats failed to lure him down, one of the cops went back to his cruiser and fetched an ax. Realizing that his perch was being chopped down, the fugitive jumped to another tree. So the police commenced to whack away at that one, too. At that point, the only option left was surrender.

Two of Major League Baseball's most significant off- season deals involve pitching greats Roger Clemens and Randy Johnson, who are second and third, respectively, among the game's all-time strikeout leaders. First, the New York Yankees, one of Clemens's former teams, signed Johnson away from the Arizona Diamondbacks with a two-year contract that obli-gates them to pay him $32 million for the next two seasons. Then, last week, the Houston Astros managed to further postpone Clemens's oft-hinted retirement by signing him to an $18-million, one-year deal that is the highest single- season salary yet for a pitcher. Baseball's all-time strikeout leaders (all of whom are retired except Clemens and Johnson), with number of batters each has fanned:

1. Nolan Ryan 5,714
2. Roger Clemens 4,317
3. Randy Johnson 4,161
4. Steve Carlton 4,136
5. Bert Blyleven 3,701
6. Tom Seaver 3,640
7. Don Sutton 3,574
8. Gaylord Perry 3,534
9. Walter Johnson 3,508
10. Phil Niekro 3,342