Iraqi Christians struggle to stay

"Nobody could get used to this," says Ayoubi, "Everywhere there was screaming [after the blast]. We went to the roof, saw the flame, and I could feel the heat from the fire on my face. Imagine if this blast happened during mass."

That's what happened Aug. 1, when a string of attacks hit churches during services, killing 11. Christian shopkeepers selling alcohol have also been targeted.

The trickle of Christians who have left Iraq - and its Christian history that dates back to the fabled Garden of Eden- - have turned into a stream.

"People are frightened. We are an easy target," says The Rev. Yousif Thomas Mirkis, a priest and theology professor. "I compare our community to pigeons. You do that" - he claps - "and they all fly."

Fr. Thomas says he tells those seeking advice to stay in Iraq, since, by his count, the community accounts for 20 percent of Iraq's doctors, and an even larger slice of professions like engineers and professors.

"We don't want our people to leave," he says . "All Iraqis are my brothers, killers and victims. If I leave, it will not solve the problem. What about the Muslims? They are not our enemies."

The Association of Muslim Scholars, a Sunni clerical group believed to have some insurgent ties, condemned the church attacks. "Islam doesn't support the ongoing terrorism," said member Sheik Abdul Sattar Abdul-Jabbar.

Such words did little to calm the churchgoers. Caretaker Jamil had received warning of a threat from US troops less than 12 hours before the blast. That convinced several in the area that the US was responsible.

"Why didn't they put someone here to protect us?" asked one Christian neighbor. "They are making all this chaos, [as an excuse] to stay in Iraq."

She returned last week after three months in the Netherlands. The violence changed her mind about staying. "Our great-great-grandfathers lived in Iraq, and I never saw a better country," says the woman, whose restaurant was bombed last year. "I'm afraid of all these attacks. This is mass destruction."

"I think the Americans made this operation [to attack churches]" says Nadwa George, a Christian neighbor. "It could not be an Iraqi - never, never."

"Under the previous regime, we were protected, really. Now with the US, we are not," says Audet Abdal, who lives next door. "My cousin was kidnapped a week ago, and released for $35,000."

"We can't go outside wearing any cross anymore," she says. "Since the US came, [insurgents] think they are punishing America [by hitting Christians], because Americans are Christians."

"If they kill me, or my son, what's the benefit of [staying in] my country?" asks Ms. Abdal.

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